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Wednesday, November 10, 2010

88th email

From: Dom Borax
To: Stacey Marchenkova
Sent: Friday June 22nd, 1999 7:21AM
Subject: RE RE RE RE RE RE Matrix and Election

Hey Stacey,

And I can’t believe I wrote

‘He likes her. She likes someone else. He then likes someone else and she ends up liking him…’

It doesn’t really mean anything; just alluding to those classic familiar romantic narratives – Age of Innocence, Sense and Sensibility, Some Kind of Wonderful etc.


PS Have you seen those films? I am such a sucker for those kinds of films. I find myself so involved in the love triangle; I so want the people to get together.

But pride, war, illness, evil parents, pledged marriage, sacrifice, romantic blindness, accident, fear, addiction or genital insecurity gets in the way and once that gets in the way some other guy steps in.

In film-talk they call him that character the "Bellamy" named after the actor Ralph Bellamy.

See I learnt this in a film class. Ralph Bellamy was in such films as His Girl Friday and Awful Truth (both great films).

He's the guy that the girl is with at the begining of the story. He's the boring but nice guy.

He's the wrong guy.

I guess Bill Pullman is the Bellamy in Sleepless in Seattle. We want Hanks and Ryan to get together but Pullman is in the way.

Simply, the Bellamy is always in the way.

Man, I love romantic comedies.

PPS We should go see a romantic comedy together one day, what do you think?

PPPS: Just had a thought, I'm not the Bellamy in my own life, am I? :)


  1. SO sad that he still won't go out on a limb and just tell her he was referring to their relationship. I think Dom is not the Bellamy for Stacey, I'd give that role to Marcus just now. However perhaps he's the Bellamy in Elsa's life, after all we are all at some point in times "just another boy/girl friend to someone. Anyone lucky enough to find their true love on the first try surely can not appreciate them. Just my thought, however sometimes your first love is your forever, you just have to go through a lot of turmoil to realize it.

  2. Oh Dom, this email was incredibly endearing.
    I really thought he was over her until he chickened out of explicitly stating what he had alluded to.
    When he does self-deprecation, it's sweet and gentle, not awkward and put on, like Stacey a few emails ago.
    He basically avoided directly talking about what they are doing, and instead, with the last line, challenged her to do it instead.
    That's what I would probably have done too, Dom.

  3. Oh my god, just say it already!
    I was starting to think Dom had finally grown a spine and was going to tell her exactly what he meant.
    It's like in 'Friends', when Ross is on the phone with Julie doing the whole, "you hang up", "no you!" thing that annoys Rachael and she grabs the phone, hangs it up and says "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were talking to me..."
    In this situation I want to be the Rachael and just be the one to tell them both that they should just grow up and do something about their feelings.
    Until that day comes these emails are going to be horrendously annoying. I hate when people don't own up to anything and just use subtle hints to say things. If you're going to elude to something to this point, I'm pretty sure saying it straight out is just not going to shock anyone.

  4. "PS Have you seen those films? I am such a sucker for those kinds of films. I find myself so involved in the love triangle; I so want the people to get together."

    Is Dom asking for a threesome with Elsa and Stacey?

    ok, seriously, they need to stop pussyfooting around each other. Dom knows, Stacey knows, we all know that they are talking about each other. The "oh im sorry, i didnt mean what i just said" line in bull%$#@.

    Then he asks Stacey out on a date to see a romantic comedy?!?! Wait till Elsa gets a load of this!!... oh wait, Elsa is just a ploy to get back with Stacey. Good work Dom. Well played Sir.

  5. Chris, love it. You have such a lovely sensitive reading of these emails. They are truly welcome. You seem like such a sweet soul.

    And yes, Marcus is the Bellamy. 100%

  6. Fyfee, another sweet response. And so truthful. I love that you would have maybe responded the same way. I hope I would have too.

    I think you might be the sweet one.

  7. Steph T, I love the friends allusion very funny. But I wonder if Dom is even aware of his subtextural writing. I have a feeling he might simply be free flowing unaware that he's even alluding to something we read as ever so obvious.

    What do other think?

    PS word of the day - 'Gah!" Anyone wanna give a proper dictionary defination of gah? Kudos goes to the most dictionary-like.

  8. Nabs, very funny - a threesome!! My lordy.

    And yeas you're right - what would Elsa say if she read his offer - I'm sure he';d defend it as innocent.

  9. Dom needs to grow some sack.

  10. Grow some sack, Dom!

  11. I think Marcus is the woman in the wheelchair in Noting Hill. And Elsa is the old lady in The Golden Girls.

  12. Sorry I don't comment that much anymore. I just sorta read it, and take it for what it is, now.

  13. Gah= used to express utter frustration at a situation in which the solution seems obvious, but is somehow being avoided.

  14. Exactly Chris, I don't think anyone can beat that answer, but feel free to try!

  15. All that needs to be said is that "Awful Truth" is one of the labels for this post...

    Good thing the truth isn't too awful in this case.

  16. This is the first post I have had to wait to read and I have to say that this might be the most compelling reading on the web. The voyeuristic nature of it is akin to smoking crack, addictive and disturbing. Nevertheless, my two cents: Dom is a huge puss. From letting her off the hook for having sex with Marcus, to doing pennance for some unexplainable reason, to this. If he is interested in connecting with Stacey (as it appears he is willing to tolerate anything to do [a dinner party with a girl you are into and the dude that she screwed after your last date?!?! WTF!?!?]) then he has to lay it on the line.

    As an aside, who are these people? My unenlightened ass would have punched Marcus in the throat and sent Stacey packing after tossing her into a vat of cat piss. But, that's just me.

  17. Anon (5:13, 5:14, 5:16) Your comments made me a little weary. I have far too many mental images in my head. How did you get inside my brain?
    Stop it, please! Before we all go mad with smut :)

  18. Randall, great to hear from you. I hope you;pve been well. Truly.

    Pop on whenever you see fit. It's heart warming just to know you're hovering.

  19. Chris, great - think that;s a great definition. Any others? And what would be the antonym of Gah, I wonder.

  20. Jason, great label pick up. Indeed I watched the film after reading this post. Has anyone seen it? it's great. Cary Grant and Irene Dunne (Dunn?) very funny. It's worth it for the dog (and cat at the end)

  21. Skeptic, welcome to Bored Olives comments. I love your turn of phrase. So feel free to comment with playful gutter-speak at anytime. It's a nice balance.

    And cheers for finding us and the kind words. Much appreciated.

  22. This a very strange turn of events. Dom always seemed to be so honest.
    And well now, he’s holding back, he’s keeping things in.
    It’s kinda painful to read, but also amusing since alot of what they are talking about seems to be mirroring their own lives. I wonder how much they do realise that it does.

    I feel like this is a half-assed answer on my part.

    I’m completely exhausted right now – been busy with school, writing, looking for work and getting ready to walk the stage at the university I graduated from.

    Also, just wanted to say a big thanks to everyone who gave me such wonderful comments two e-mails ago. It brought a smile to my face even though things haven’t been the most upbeat lately.

    Off to bed I go.

  23. Everyone seems to think that it's just a simple matter of laying it all on the line for these two, and getting on with it. From my own (possibly pathetic) experience, I can still see the possibility that Dom doesn't really know if Stacey has feelings for him. I have been in situations where I have felt sure and been rebuked (or is it rebuffed?) at the last instance. Further, I have missed opportunities which I now look back on as being a sure thing, because I was let down by my own lack of self-confidence. When it means something, the answer is never clear, so each one is waiting for the other to make the move. Story of my life.

  24. Hey Steven, enjoy this blog as much as everyone else is (though I might be too embarrassed to admit in public). I just wondered where these guys are from. At first, mainly from the humour and spelling I assumed Brits, but that moved on to Aussies because of a few bits and bobs I picked up but can't remember which specific bits they were. Then I looked at your profile and you're a Scot! It won't affect anything, just now I might be able to add an accent to any imaginary voices in my head! Also, have the real life Dom and Stacey cottoned on to this blog yet?

    Anyway, ta for sharing this with us - it may be none of our business but it is more compelling than anything on telly. How many more emails have you got saved up?

  25. Chris Dixon, this is a wonderful response; a response I'm sure regular readers of these comments will eat up.

    What spoke to me in your words was Dom's lack of confidence. I think this is so true and though some might label him as a puss and needing to grow a sac; I'm inclined to take your reading.

  26. Anon (2:29), welcome to the bored olives commetns. I love that fact you think this is better than telly. I agree.

    And please don't feel any shame in admitting you like it in public. Indeed please yell it as loud as you can so the public might hear. Well maybe.

    To answer you geographic question; Dom and Stacey's story is Australian based; hence the UK-like spelling. To be more specific it takes places in Brisbane.

    Though this reveal might not help the voices in your head as Oz twang can feel slow. So dispell the culteral cliches and think of them with fast paced city accents. Probably more modern London than anything.

  27. Oops Stephanie, missed your comment. Sorry.
    So you're about to graduate? Congrats. will you doff the hat and don the gown?

    And I know a lot of what Dom says mirrors his own experience. But I'm not convinced he's aware.

    Hope you had a good night's sleep.

  28. Anon (10:56) sorry don't know what you mean.

  29. No worries, Stephen.

    And I technically graduated from English this past spring, but I had gone on a trip with my family so I missed out. So the school is letting me walk the stage on Saturday during the Fall graduation.

    Since I didn't find a full-time job, I am now attending the community college near my home. The program is largely based on writing -- creatively and for the workplace. It's been fun so far. Deadlines help me get things done.


  30. I think the antonym for Gah would just drop the G and be ah... that way you go from enough already to finally.

  31. Stephanie, good luck on Sat'. A moment to celebrate all the hard work, hey? Family will no doubt be very proud.

  32. Isn't amazing how two things so different can me so eerily similar.

  33. gah -- why doesn't he see how much more he cud hav if he just let go

    ah -- he did want to let go... just not for me

    perfect... i think i just had my epiphany...

  34. chris, ipshi, everyone!!! -lmao you guys are great! i agree. Dom, cud have had more punch in this one.

    [will be back soon - still uni-ing it up. homestretch now!!WOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!]


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