Posts
From: Dom Borax
To: Stacey Marchenkova
Sent: Sunday, May 23rd, 1999 12:01 PM
Subject: RE RE RE RE RE So sorry
Stacey,
I feel right shamed by my last email. You must think I’m a lunatic; a real-howl-mooning-Dom-crazy-pants with a collection of aluminium cans and an imaginary friend who has their own imaginary friend that I refuse to admit exists.
See, I’ve never told anyone about my hotel processing before.
Man, I feel like such a wanker.
Please don’t tell anyone. Please.
I know it’s a little nuts. I do. I guess I get a little nuts sometimes.
And my sojourn to the Hilton really helps me put things in perspective.
In a nutsoid way.
And it’s really private. So why the hell did I share it? I won’t ever be able to do it again without truly turning beetroot red.
I have ruined it for myself. You knob shiner, Dom.
See, a large part of me wished I’d never shared it.
Actually it’s more than a large part; every part of my being regrets sharing this.
It’s like admitting you suck your thumb when you’re an adult.
(Which I don’t – I also don’t wet the bed, hurt small animals, start fires or snuggle with a comforter either.
I did however like the Musical Cats when I was thirteen.
“…Of all things can it be really? Yes no – ho-hi oh my eye”
I even indulged in Lloyd-Webber merchandise and purchased the hooded jacket with yellow eyes watching because I thought it was cool and not creepy in any way.
I also had a crush on RuPaul for some reason when I was younger.
When I was a kid I wanted to be an archaeologist/hairdresser so I could finally find out why Cleopatra’s hair was so shiny.
And when I was 15, I became obsessed with the movie Mermaids and had many a dream of Winona Ryder licking my leather jacket. I even posted her my Cats leather jacket with detailed instructions of where she should place her DNA)
Anyway – whatever – with all these admissions, I still think my last email trumps them all.
God I’m an idiot. I hope you can just delete the last email. Please delete it.
Please.
Man, now I feel so indulgent too.
And whiny.
I’ve become one of those indulgent whiny men who end up running the country for far too long.
Can you forgive me for that too? (not running the country – for I’m certain if I had that job, my in-house parliamentary memos would be so indulgent that the Reserve Bank’s interest rates would quickly lose interest and the country would be weeping over a tub of vanilla ice-cream an insurance commercials come the end of the year)
Anyway hope my lame attempt at humour might have softened the blow of the wailing wetness of the proceeding.
Yours in dickheadedness
Dom.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteAbove post was me - deleted on accident!
ReplyDeleteDom is getting ridiculous. I'm certainly not a fan of Stacey, but Dom's head-hanging, oh-woe-is-me act is hilariously infuriating. His admissions of liking Cats, having a crush on RuPaul (???), Mermaids and Winona Ryder (?!?!?!?), etc., had me rolling with laughter but shaking my head at the same time. "I regret sharing something embarrassingly private with you, so I'm going to tell you that I dreamed about Winona Ryder licking my jacket. Oh, and I also had a crush on a drag queen."
I'm completely baffled by Dom's ability to continue sending these types of e-mails out despite his realization and admission of becoming "one of those indulgent whiny men."
Dom is 110% knobshiner, no doubt. But Stacey is also a completely pretentious nufty. Are we really up to 48 emails already? That's gone fast.
ReplyDeleteIs it just me or does the word 'undergrad' sum up everything about these two?
(not that I wasn't an annoying pain in the butt in my undergrad years, using newfound sociology terms etc.)
You know, now that you've pointed it out, they do remind me a LOT of the freshman English students at my old uni. Pretentious doesn't begin to cover it :)
ReplyDeleteI am starting to really dislike Dom now. I still dislike Stacey, but I'm not sure which one I hate more. These people both need to grow up and stop trying so hard. If you have to try this hard at something, it's not supposed to happen.
ReplyDeleteEither it's meant to be or it's not. In this case I am going to go with the latter.
UGH....at this point that's all I have to say.......Ugh
Arg. I don't know what to think of this e-mail. I'm kind of frustrated with Dom right now (he seems to be bi-polar -- being angry and then acting like a scolded puppy, whimpering and asking to be forgiven). In this one, he seems to be giving in -- he hints at wanting forgiveness from Stacy. (ie. "Can you forgive me for that too?")I could be wrong. Maybe he is trying to be the bigger person and admits he's sorry in hopes of making it better between them. It's just a guess. I'm still waiting for the next few emails before I pick sides.
ReplyDeleteMy loyalty to team neutral still remains.
[P.S. in the earlier comments, I wrote under the name 'Steph' but I figured with another Steph around I just use the longer version. lol]
Reading this just made me really angry with Dom. Of course, I don't think he has another way to go about it if he's trying to salvage what's left of their relationship. Even though it's a "last resort" of sorts, he's still trying to maintain control, I think.
ReplyDeleteNoooo Dom! Just stop. There are parts of our lives we keep to ourselves for a reason. You're digging his hole so deep you'll be emerging in china if you carry on.
ReplyDeleteIf he wanted things to work with Stacey he shouldn't have gone off like this, he shouldn't turned a blind eye to it, ignored it and manned up. Or burnt the bridge between him and Stacey and just left her alone, given the whole thing up as a bad job. But,like myself, Dom doesn't know when to give up and thinks this will help... It won't :(
I appogise for any spelling mistakes, I'm typing this from my phone, I'll explain why at the end of this week on my blog, if anyone is even interested.
im commenting before the scamp?? how is this possible?
ReplyDeleteso this mail has categorically and finally put me in team Neutral. Dom is just completely demonstrating how immature he is, but considering that Stacey is as old as he is... things might just b evened out soon enough.
its really interesting how he thinks telling her weirder things about himself might redeem the problems of the earlier mail. I cant even begin to think on those lines. Can anybody explain this to me?
and dux... trust me i will be reading to check the reason.. u dont write blog posts fast enuf for me :)
ReplyDeleteThis will be my shortest post yet: Dom. wtf. i really can't express how badly i want to slap him right now.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, ipshi! I've been really busy, but the blog post will be up for Friday evening or Saturday.
ReplyDeleteHello all - sorry for tardiness - but i've come down with a walloping flu. I didn't want to not respond to the ever fascinating comments.
ReplyDeleteSo if you bear with me, I'll answer all tomorrow.
As a taster, I've been thinking about Dom and his decline into knobiness. It seemded to start after the romance was dashed. I suspect it's truly eating him up and his firing in every direction - in a attempt to stop obsessing/hurting. He's been contrived, manipulative, self depricating, passive aggressive and here I think he's trying to recapture a degree of wit. He's trying anything to keep Stacey present.
I actually found this email endearing in a way. I didn't believe he had a crush on RuPaul or liked Cats the musical. I think he's offering these embarrassing moments as humour to level the playing field.
Anyway, again a hearty thanks for your comments and I will repsond to them all in the next few days.
Hope you're all hapy and well.
Of course it might be the fevery flu that's bringing out the sentamentalist in me.
ReplyDeleteawwwwwww, please get well soon papa bear!! loads of hugs!!
ReplyDeleteI'm sick too! So, sympathy to you Stephen, and a slight delay on my scoring system. Although the "keeping someone present" idea that Stephen floated hit a chord with me, before that I was in the Hiranga camp on this one - eg big slap to Dom! :)
ReplyDeleteyou know knob shiner makes me smile...its an excellent word!..i also like that he liked cats enough to quote it...
ReplyDeleteand i forgive him for being young and less wise than all of us sophisticated and worldy grown ups...and i really value his sticking with this and with her...cos when youve been hurt and foolish and weak and ridiculous it might seem easier to get the fuck out of Dodge...and i forgive him for being contrived and passive aggressive and imperfect.. cos he is funny and unusual and ceative and bright and honest at least some of the time and he plays games and he tells stories...i have no idea how stacey will respond to this email, but thats the way i did...WW
Jason, welcome to the comments of Bored Olives. I actually found the email quite funny and read it as intended. Perhaps I'm reading too much into the
ReplyDelete"Anyway hope my lame attempt at humour might have softened the blow of the wailing wetness of the proceeding."
Was a literal attempt to soften the previous email with Domish humour. So I hope Stacey, like you, was also laughing.
Erin, I think you're post on they are undergrad. Indeed Dom is truly so. They are only 19, I think - so I suspect this undergrad intellectualism is both exploring their poetic muscle and wit.
ReplyDeleteI guess it needs to be explored before found.
Liz, and unfortunately I too was one of those freshman english students. Argghhhh.
ReplyDeleteSteph T - I hate this is frustrating you - I agree they are trying too hard - but I suspect this is the journey they have to go on
ReplyDelete(I think the above sounds like it could be one of those profound statements but maybe not)
Stephanie thanks for clearing it up the Stephanie/Stephen name is such a cool one everyone wants it.
ReplyDeleteI think you've hit something really interesting here - that Dom's apology is an attmept to make it better between them. I agree.
And if it helps (as a sneak preview) it does.
Jay welcome to bored olives comments. I think you've offerned something really interesting - Dom is a control freak. I kinda like that.
ReplyDeleteDux, I have faith. I really do. I know he might have gone about it with too much attack - but he's in love after all, isn't he?
ReplyDeleteThanks Ipshi for the get well soon wishes. Still coughing too much but kicking it. Had to work through it this time too which wasn't fun.
ReplyDeleteWanted to hang on the couch and watch bad movies (Jaws 4 - the revenge anyone) but had to muster energy to teach a lovely group of freshman film students. Hello Tier 1a if anyone reads this btw.
Hiranga, shortest reply ever. Do it!
ReplyDeleteMissy M, get well soon back at ya. Are you cosied up watching bad telly?
ReplyDeleteWW, I love your comment. I feel exactly the same way.
ReplyDeleteAnd to requote you:
"and i forgive him for being contrived and passive aggressive and imperfect.. cos he is funny and unusual and ceative and bright and honest at least some of the time and he plays games and he tells stories"
Love it.
It might also be worth considering that this whole saga has actually taken place over a very short period of time.
ReplyDeleteThe first email was April 28, 1999
May 7th first 'date'
May 15th second 'date'
May 20th meeting/confession
May 22nd Dom checks in
So from the first email to latest this has only been going on about three weeks. And from first email to Stacy's 'betrayal' (and Dom's drunken dissapearance) 17 days.
Therefore perhaps I should revise my earlier comments relating to Dom, implying that he was not forward enough. Likewise I don't think the relationship was yet out of it's infancy enough to demand loyalty from Stacy. She hadn't known him for that long and perhaps others (ie: Marcus) could also approach that level of familiarity under the right circumstances. Especially if she was vulnerable because of her apparent rejection by Dom.
At this point Dom really has nothing to lose, so by continuing on the same line of emotive humour as above he's at least staying on the same path that got him accepted by Stacy in the first place. There's nowhere for them to go but up or not at all. (Within reason, because realistically there's a whole range of imaginative options for going down)
Objective neutrality (Heptasyllabicism? :) )- but because I dislike both parties less rather than dislike them both more. A case of unfortunate circumstances.
There it is. I'm sure I'll refute this too eventually.
yay feathertop... really interesting point!...WW
ReplyDeleteWOW @feathertop!! "Objective neutrality (Heptasyllabicism)" i love the usage of such words in an wonderfully woven context...
ReplyDeleteand yes, it is important to see things from the point of view of time elapsed between all of their meetings and correspondence
wow yea, that does put a lot into perspective doesn't it! and heptasyllabicism, Feathertop - yup LOL - awesome ! :)
ReplyDeleteIpshi, while I agree and am on team neutral at this phase of the game I do get his logic. His latest email here is the attempt at humor, see while there may be bits of truth they are all things that anyone who has ever been young... which is all of us I assume unless we receive our genes from Benjamin Button... have felt. Well not so much the drag queen crush but the embarrasing things we liked as kids.. hell I used to like Clay Aiken... That being said, the hotel ritual is a deeply personal and embarassing thing (at least to him) that is happening in the moment.. and while we all may have moments of shame in our pass who wants to admit our current faults and follies? Never mind a ritual of cleansing that as someone (and sorry I forget who) pointed out seems all most as demented as a serial killers ritual. He's taking the attention off of the now.. to an extent, and simutaniously (sure i butchered the hell out of the spelling) offering a proverbial olive branch... using his main charm... humor.
ReplyDeletewell chris --- u did butcher the spelling of simultaneously but its ok as ur main charm (writing really well) works rather well at impressing others.
ReplyDelete